Are You Keeping Score?

Is your value based on the number of birthday cards you receive each year or the texts you get on other important dates? Does proof of your worth arrive in the form of gifts and compliments or do you believe people love you regardless of gestures? Do you know whom reached out to whom last?

If so, you are functioning from a place of self-centered fear and not from wholehearted love. You are keeping score; therefore, you cannot live freely.

Allowing someone’s behavior to dictate your worth means you give away your power to love as you were meant to, as the light-filled soul of generosity and compassion that you are.

I used to wonder why a friend didn’t give me thoughtful gifts in exchange for what I gave them. Or why they didn’t me any gifts at all. Then I realized I didn’t care. As suddenly as the thought came in was as quickly as it left because the feeling I get when around this human blows any gift out of the water. I do not think I am loved any less by her if she doesn’t text me for my birthday. It doesn’t matter. She makes me feel like love when I am with her. She is my gift. We are connected in a way that no card, bouquet, or trinket can replace.

Have you considered that your siblings, best friends, or parents may become distracted or forgetful at times, and that their forgetfulness has nothing to do with their love for you?  Can you accept that people have different values than you? Can you “love them anyway?” (My favorite quote from Mother Teresa.) If you send the thank you card and your friend does not, do you write them off because they are not as thoughtful as you, in your estimation?

Will you choose what matters—the feeling of connection and comfort you get in someone’s presence over concessions? Will you stay true to who you are and how you want to live regardless of differing belief systems?

Embracing a life of love means you are committed to your worth and the worth of others regardless of anyone’s perception of you or their actions toward you. Your worth and your value is not defined by others. Their worth and their value is no longer defined by their actions. Your worth and their worth is defined only by love, and you are both loved and worthy just for being alive.

This commitment to love is the escape hatch of self-centered fear and is open and waiting for you to access it. Once you cross this threshold, you will begin to believe that every move someone makes and every word someone says is not about you. Gaining access to this point of egress down in the center of your being, your soul is free to shine with light and love. This newfound power will allow you to choose a new path, to change your thoughts and your behavior so you no longer react in fear, but in love.

Rise in love each time you feel slighted and watch your worth skyrocket to heights you never dreamed possible.